The Battle of Bert
or how Repo MacAle got his name

| The Battle of Bert | In the Beginning |

The annual Clan MacAle gathering occurs at the end of July in the highlands of Enumclaw. Many other Clans also gather in the same area to attend the Seattle Highland Games and the many Clan parties and potlucks that follow.

Hurlin’ and Wicked MacAle brought a guest with them to the 2002 gathering - the famous, and rare, life-sized Bert Grant cutout. He came bearing a six-pack of MacAle Scottish Ale and generously agreed to pose for pictures with each of our members.

The MacAle appointed Bert an honorary lifetime member and gave him a Clan MacAle ball cap, which he proudly wore for the pictures. Being a true MacAle, Bert needed assistance to stand for all of the photos so he was securely attached to a pole of the “great hall” tent. During the day he was much admired and happily posed with the rowdy MacAles. His sense of humor never wavered - even when some of the MacAles tried to peek under his kilt.

Later that evening, after the feast, many MacAles were gathered in wee groups, talking and drinking. There was a relaxed air of camaraderie mixed with the occasional loud burst of merriment at a humorous story. The MacAle was circulating, joining each conversation momentarily, and all was well.

Suddenly there was a cry from the edge of the camp, “They’ve taken Bert!” yelled Honey MacAle. “I saw reivers cut him down but thought they were just going to put him away for the night. Suddenly they veered out of the light and into the darkened road where they stopped to congratulate each other. I heard them say: ‘Aha! We stole Bert!’”

The MacAle cried, “Which way did they go?”

Honey pointed to the darkened road, “That-a-way! Towards the cludgies!”

The MacAle leaped up in pursuit. She ran into Runny MacAle coming out of one of the cludgies.

“Runny, they’ve kidnapped Bert!” cried the MacAle.

“I know!” he said. “It was Roadkill MacAle and his gang. They were running by me boasting loudly to all they met that they had kidnapped Bert. I asked them where they were going and the silly fools said ‘to the Keith camp!’ I know where it is. Let’s go get him back!”

Runny and the MacAle strode quietly and confidently through the dark towards the campsite. As they got nearer, they crept silently into the shadow of a neighboring trailer. They could see a wee gathering in a well-lit area in front of the next trailer.

Runny held up his hand, “Wait here.” he said. I’m a Repo-man by trade. I repossess things all the time. I know what to do. I’ll sneak around the back of the trailer and get Bert when they’re not looking.”

The MacAle watched as Runny moved off across the darkened road, away from the circle of light coming from the trailer. She saw him move around to the back and strained to listen for any problems. The MacAle could see that the people at the trailer were gathered around Bert, listening to the reivers boast about their prowess and congratulating each other loudly.

After a short while, Stumble and Guinn MacAle arrived. Striding quickly up to The MacAle, Guinn said, “What’s going on?” Stumble said, ”We saw you leave in a hurry so we followed you. What happened?”

The MacAle quietly filled them in and when they would rush into the camp, she held them back. “Runny went around back. Wait a moment.”

Just then, Runny appeared saying, “I need a diversion!”

Guinn said, “That’s my trailer they’re in front of. I can go in there and not cause suspicion. Stumble, come with me, I have a plan.”

Guinn and Stumble moved into the lit area and started to talk about the details of a famous battle. Soon all the people in front of the trailer were drawn into the conversation, debating various points. Runny waited a moment and crept around the back of the trailer again.

Soon The MacAle saw a flash of white streak across a darker part of the road a wee distance away. “That had to be Runny!” she thought. Just then she heard Guinn loudly express his thanks to the people at the trailer and Stumble say, “Thanks for clearing that up.”

They walked out of the camp and into the shadow of the trailer where The MacAle waited. “He got him.” grinned Guinn and Stumble. “Let’s go.”

The MacAle told them she had seen a streak of white crossing the road. “It must have been him! I didn’t know he could run so quickly and quietly!”

The three of them walked off, back to the MacAle encampment. A short distance away they heard someone back at the trailer say in a confused tone, “Where’s Bert?”

They chuckled to themselves as they arrived and congratulated Runny when he appeared, carefully holding Bert and saying proudly, “I didn’t even lose his hat!”

The MacAle thanked him and proclaimed to all that he would now be known as REPO MacAle!

Bert was tucked away in a trailer for the night and spent the rest of the gathering in safety. The next morning Roadkill MacAle was declared a persona non gratis and there were many revenge plans being discussed by the MacAles.

Bert say’s,

“Wait ‘til next year!”

Read the 'official' testimony by Repo Macale here!
(you will need the free Adobe Acrobat Reader)

| The Battle of Bert | In the Beginning |